New definitions

The medical profession now has some new terms to use among themselves for unusual ailments or injuries.

Excerpt

Disco biscuits: The clubbers' drug ecstasy. As in: "The man in cubicle three looks like he's taken one too many disco biscuits."

Hasselhoff: Term for any patient who shows up in the emergency room with an injury for which there is a bizarre explanation. Source: Baywatch actor David Hasselhoff, who hit his head on a chandelier while shaving. The broken glass severed four tendons and and an artery in his right arm.

Agnostication: A substitute for prognostication. Term used to the describe the usually vain attempt to answer the question: "How long have I got, doc?"

Blamestorming: Apportioning of blame after the wrong leg or kidney is removed or some other particularly egregious foul-up happens.

404 moment: The point in a doctor's ward round when medical records cannot be located. Comes from internet error message, "404 - document not found."

Testiculation: Description of a gesture typically used by hospital consultant "when holding forth on subject on which he or she has little knowledge". Gesture is of an upturned hand with outstretched fingers pointed upwards, clutching an invisible pair of testicles.

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Congratulations to the 'Cats

Congratulations to the UC Bearcats for their 31-21 win of Southern Miss today.

It was a great cap off to a 10-3 season. If I would have told you on January 1 that UC football would be the most successful team in the city, you would have checked me into a funny farm. But it looks like that's how it's going to shake out.

Great job Brian Kelly and the boys.

"Progressives"

It looks like Cuyahoga county is going back to paper ballots because they can't seem to get their act into the the 21st century.

This a great case study in the differences between "progressives" and "conservatives".

It was the "progressives" that first complained that paper ballots weren't an adequate voting system and disenfranchised the poor.

Then it was the "progressives" who run Cuyahoga county that can seem to make the transition into the new voting machines like the rest of Ohio's 87 counties.

Now after months of time and millions of dollars, it's the "progressives" that claim they need to go back to the old way of voting.

And "conservatives" just sat back and said "there was noting wrong with the old way in the first place".

Leg lamp

How does this work?

The state of Ohio's unemployment fund is going broke.

What I don't get is how a fund that takes in 1.05 billion and pays out 1.07 billion is about to go bust (HT daily bellweather). What the hell do they invest these funds in, a Spear's Girl Chastity fund?

Look at the blue curve on this schedule... where the hell is the money going?

Once again, I'm not as smart as a "journalist" but it occurs to me that if you are taking in about the same amount that you're spending, how does your fund go broke?

Maybe a question one of those journalist types can ask.

If you have to say it......

Clinton Says Wife a 'World-Class Genius'

I'll give slick credit for one thing.... I took a world class genius to figure out that socialized medicine plan she laid out in '94.

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Economic lesson 101

If you are a recent public school grad or a liberal, in general, here is an awesome economic lesson for you.

Excerpt

What is less widely understood is that they have also transformed politics. A zero-sum economy leads, inevitably, to repression at home and plunder abroad. In traditional agrarian societies the surpluses extracted from the vast majority of peasants supported the relatively luxurious lifestyles of military, bureaucratic and noble elites. The only way to increase the prosperity of an entire people was to steal from another one. Some peoples made almost a business out of such plunder: The Roman republic was one example; the nomads of the Eurasian steppes, who reached their apogee of success under Genghis Khan and his successors, were another. The European conquerors of the 16th to 18th centuries were, arguably, a third. In a world of stagnant living standards the gains of one group came at the expense of equal, if not still bigger, losses for others. This, then, was a world of savage repression and brutal predation.

It's always been my impression that liberals view an economy as a zero sum game; one pie, what I don't get someone else gets. When, in fact, free markets create bigger pies for all to dig into as long as you add an ingredient.

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Christmas Lights Gone Wild

If you've never seen the lights display by an electrical engineer in Mason, OH. Check this one out.

I've been told they moved this to a local park. If you know where, please let me know in the comment section.

Christmas Vacation Lights

My neighbors have this set up going without the class.

Fleeing a blue state

As posted just yesterday, when are the people who govern "blue state" areas ever going to wonder why people are flocking to "red state" areas.

An article in today's LA Times addresses California's migration out of the state.

Excerpt

California's population continued to grow modestly in the last fiscal year despite a significant exodus of residents to other states, according to a state report released Wednesday.

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Clear Channel sucks

Now that Clear Channel has a monopoly on local radio here, they're in the process of chopping heads; especially the talent on the radio. I cannot stand to listen to local radio here anymore.

Here's the email I sent to Daryl parks this morning.

Daryl

I saw a bum walking near Kenwood Town Center today. I figured he must be Burbank’s replacement.

After seeing what you guys have done with all the other Clear Channel talent, he must be just what you’re looking for.

Thank God my wife is getting me XM for Christmas.

Respectfully
Gordon

Bumper sticker of the day

My sentiments exactly.

Hat Tip to Taxprof

Prison rapes

Bill at the Daily Bellweather has a piece about the number of rapes committed on prisoners.

Excerpt

A Justice Department survey of 146 federal and state penitentiaries across the nation shows 60,500 inmates were subject to sexual victimization behind bars this year. That breaks down to 4.5% of all who are locked up, according to an estimate by the agency's bureau of justice statistics. The national survey included three Ohio prisons -- Belmont Correctional Institution, Grafton Correctional Institution and North Central Correctional Institution. All three hold male convicts.

I wonder how many of those rapes were committed by thugs on death row that should have been executed by now.

President Bush, tear down this bridge

During the the summer, I was pretty indignant about the total failure of government when the Minneapolis bridge collapsed.

In my opinion, we can expect a similar failure of government when the Brent Spence Bridge collapses into the Ohio River.

Yesterday, officials from Covington, Kentucky tried to ban trucks on the bridge because of the safety hazard they present. If you've ever driven the bridge, you know what they are talking about.

Here's the deal. Every city, state and federal government official knows this bridge is substandard and obsolete for the traffic it receives on a daily basis. So how close are we to getting the problem solved?

(silence)

No where. We don't even have a plan to start the plan yet.

I would wage a bet. If you polled people in this city they would overwhelmingly approve of spending money on that bridge over, say, sound walls along the interstate.

As far as I'm concerned, every politician is responsible for each and every death that occurs on that bridge until there's a plan to replace it.

And people want these same folks to manage our health care.

Speaking of Snoop

An old clip from the Man SHow

Snooping your records

The IRS has encountered an increasing problem of workers snooping on confidential taxpayer files.

By law, it's illegal for an IRS employee to look into tax records unless they have a business reason for looking at the records.

Here's a excerpt from a piece in the WSJ

Despite repeated warnings by IRS officials over many years, IRS employees still are getting nabbed for snooping through confidential taxpayer records without authorization. In some cases, IRS workers were curious about an ex-spouse or neighbor, but in at least one case, an employee was paid by an outsider for information that was used by identity thieves. According to interviews with Treasury officials and a new report, hundreds of IRS workers were disciplined in the year ended Sept. 30 for breaking the rules, and some have even faced prosecution.

Just imagine your medical records being house in some government building somewhere... Do you like the prospects of person keeping their sticky fingers off of your confidential files.

Delusional "journalists"

I used to think all these "journalists" were arrogant, now it's clear, they are delusional.

Case in point. An excerpt from this article

Still, the network continues to chase Fox News in across-the-board ratings, and at the same time must fend off MSNBC, which so far has enjoyed a 20 percent jump in total year-to-date viewers over last year—thanks in part to the popularity of its late-night “doc block,” which often features grisly true-crime narratives and repurposed Dateline programming.

“When they do that, they’re really competing with Court TV,” Mr. Klein later told NYTV in an interview in his office overlooking Columbus Circle. “They’re saying, in effect, we give up trying to cover the news in any meaningful way. It enhances our brand. We’re the last man standing in terms of covering the news. We love that.”

This is the same CNN that covered the size of Jennifer Love Hewitt's ass on one of it's program. Yeah, that's coving news in a meaningful way.

Who is Daniel Faulkner?

Prior to yesterday, I couldn't tell you one thing about Daniel Faulkner.

However, many people know who Mumia Abu-Jamal is.

Abu-Jamal is cause celebre for the Hollywood anti death penalty advocates like Sean Penn and Danny Glover. Faulkner is the cop he shot and killed.

You know there's one more reason I'm an advocate of the death penalty, the remaining victims.

Every time one of these liberal types worships at the alter of Abu-Jamal, it rubs the whole affair right into the noses of the friends and family of Daniel Faulkner.

The day Abu-Jamal meets his maker, the Faulkner family will finally have some peace and won't need to relive the horror each and every time they want to remind people of the crime Mr. Abu-Jamal actually committed.

Blue City - Red Lights

I'm not the smartest guy in the world but I always follow and emulate what the smartest guys in the world are doing.

So if I'm a city of Cincinnati Council member, I'm looking at what the suburbs are doing because they must be doing something right. After all, everyone's leaving my city for the 'burbs.

But it's clear that Cincinnati Clowncil members are dumbasses. You know why? They continue to do things that none of the suburbs are doing and wonder why people continue to leave.

Case in point. Just like all other urban centers, the city of Cincinnati is looking to install red light cameras to generate revenue for the budget. Now ask yourself this question... Do these cameras make it more likely or less likely for people to reside and/or do business in your city? Then ask yourself, what are the suburbs doing?

West Chester - red light cameras? Nope.
Mason - human rights ordinance? Nada.
Sycamore Twp. - earnings tax? negative.
Loveland - prevailing wage? sorry
Green Twp. - trans fat ban? Not there yet.

In fact, suburbs do none of this stupid crap which is why people are flocking to them in droves.

Once again, I throw out this map of the Kerry/Bush race by county.

While I do not have specific statistics, I think we can all agree on the following....

The Blue Counties are largely urban areas run by democrats; Red counties are largely suburban and/or rural areas run by republicans.

Urban areas have more crime, poorer schools, higher taxes, bad infrastructure, & lower standard of living.

Rural/suburban areas have less crime, better schools, lower taxes, better infrastructure and a higher standard of living.

I challenge all liberals. You tell me. Who's doing a better job of governing their respective constituency?

He's not withheld a single document

Remember the Slick One telling the media, after one of Hillary's debate bombs, that he's not withheld the release one document from the public.

Well...........

The National Archives is withholding from the public about 2,600 pages of records at President Clinton's direction, despite a public assurance by one of his top aides last month that Mr. Clinton "has not blocked the release of a single document."

The 2,600 pages, stored at Mr. Clinton's library in Arkansas, were deemed to contain "confidential advice" and, therefore, "closed" under the Presidential Records Act, an Archives spokeswoman, Susan Cooper, told The New York Sun yesterday.

I like to preach that the American public always gets the right president for the times and the Clinton's were no exception. The 1990's will go down as the least serious decade in the history of humanity. No "Cold War", a stock market boom that had 30 year olds thinking they were retiring before the age of 40, tech jobs where people could show up in pajamas to do their work, and a new concept in reality shows called The Clinton's.

We could watch 24 hour news channels and be mesmerized with the questions, did he nail the fat chick? what about all those people Hillary fired in the White House post office? Vince Foster? billing records? Whitewater? etc. etc. etc.

I'm convinced it was the beginning of the reality show craze.

Unfortunately, for the Clinton's their show is starting to wear thin... Just like Survivor - China.

Dick Morris

Whenever I read Dick Morris, I always get an insatiable urge to put on a ball gag and my leather chaps.....

Regardless, he's got a good piece on Hillary.

Excerpt

A lot of voters are backing Hillary because they see her as a winner and they are hungry to throw the Republicans out of the White House. When Mrs. Clinton touts her experience (and Mr. Clinton does it for her), the voters don’t necessarily hear government experience. A lot focus on her campaign experience instead. The team that survived Gennifer Flowers and the draft and the Contract With America and Monica and carpet-bagging in New York state can, presumably, weather any storm. Hillary has a carefully cultivated impression of invincibility that serves as one of her principal attractions to Democratic primary voters.

But what will happen if she loses in Iowa or in New Hampshire? The latest average of the past five polls in Iowa, compiled by www.realclearpolitics.com, shows Obama in the lead, 30-26. If the Illinois senator wins in Iowa, it could send Hillary to defeat in New Hampshire, where her lead in the past five polls averaged only 3 points.

Since so much of her vote is based on her presumed ability to win elections, her loss of the winner image might set in motion a domino effect of cascading defeats in the primaries far more dramatic than is typical in presidential elections. The more her current vote share is based on the presumption of invincibility, the more a defeat — or several in a row — could hurt.

More.....

You can fight city hall.

A long time ago, I read an article on wealth that proclaimed "it's not the wealth you own that matters.... it's the wealth you control".

For years, that cliche has stuck in my mind. But the longer, I live the more I see it play out.

One need look no further than Mike Brown, the owner of the Bengals. He doesn't "own" any stadiums or riverfront property but he has total control over a half billion dollars in property on the Cincinnati riverfront. What a sweet deal; total control and none of the responsibility.

It works that way for cities as well. Why buy property you don't want developed or want developed a certain way when you can simply put zoning restrictions on the property that makes it worthless.

Well, Half Moon Bay CA thought they could limit development on a property by declaring it a "wetland", thus making it worthless. The developer, who paid one million dollars for the property, sued the city.

The result....

Half Moon Bay is wrestling with unpleasant options for responding to a court ruling that officials say threatens the "very existence of our city government" - a $36.8 million judgment against the city for turning a proposed housing development site into wetlands.

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blog votes

If you are a blogger junkie as I am, you need to go over to Right on the Right to nominate and vote for your favorite blogs by category.

I'm sure he's handing out huge prize money for winners. Like Al Gore's nobel prize money :)

Would have been nice to know that

A interesting piece on the Hamilton county jail residents.

It might have been nice if we had received this information prior to actually voting on a new jail space for the county.

Clinton experience myth

While the Hill likes to trumpet her experience, I'd like to ask... What experience?

She was first lady for eight years, does that mean Laura Bush is qualified to be president?

Oh Gordon, it's her senate experience that makes her qualified.

Seven years in the senate, OK, I'll give you that, what committee did/does she chair? For that matter what legislation did/has she sponsored? What issue is she so committed to that she ushered it through the house and senate and got the president to sign because of public pressure?

chirp chirp chirp

Nothing, nada zero

Say what you want about Al Gore, but at least we know what we're going to get with the guy.

For cryin' out loud, she wasn't even a managing partner at her law firm.

Debra Saunders echoes my sentiments.

Excerpt

Hillary Clinton has been in the U.S. Senate for seven years. Before that, she spent eight years as first lady -- and she did more than pick out the drapes. Mrs. C had a role in many Clinton initiatives, including as chair of her husband's failed health care reform task force.

Still, her most valuable political skill was to neutralize her husband's "bimbo eruptions." In 1992, she appeared with her husband on "60 Minutes" as he admitted to straying in his marriage, but denied having an affair with singer Gennifer Flowers -- a false denial, it turns out. In 1998, Hillary Clinton blamed the Monica Lewinsky story on a "vast right-wing conspiracy."

Somehow those 15 years have expanded like dog years into "35 years fighting for what I believe in." That is, Clinton's political years include her 15 years as a corporate lawyer, her three years as a law school professor, as well as her tenure as first lady of Arkansas.

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Another law firm of scumbags

The IRS has a whistleblower program, a program designed to pay people for information regarding tax cheats. The usual fee is about 15-30% of the tax collected.

Now that the program has been implemented, a number of law firms have just willy nilly started turning in companies for audit on whistle blower complaints.

The latest is the Ferraro Law Firm in Florida who's turned in two billion dollars in whistleblower complaints yet to be investigated by the IRS. What a great deal, if the IRS audits the company, comes up with 2 billion in revenue that's a cool 600 million for the firm; and the best part? They don't have to do one damn thing.

All the while, companies have to deal with the consequence of dealing with audits and IRS agents with no probable cause.

While the guys at my fellow conservative blogs NixGuy, Bizzyblog, and Smoke if you got 'em want to spend their time and energy making sure payday loan operations aren't ripping off the public, how about spending some of that energy on these low life parasites.

And the legal profession wonders why they have such a bad reputation.

Clean up some confusion

I've been getting google hits as taxman gordon. While my pen name is Gordon and my site is taxmanblog this is not the taxmangordon site.

The taxmangordon site is a fun little game where you play "pacman" and attempt to make as much money as possible while avoiding one of Gordon Brown's 111 tax hikes.

Try it here.

Who's your daddy? part 2

I'm always upset that there is never a reference to a father when you see a delinquent accused of a crime.

Apparently, it's because liberals have difficulty in distinguishing who their actual parents are. Quote from a letter to the editor in the San Fransisco Chronicle (hat tip to BOTW)

Editor - I keep reading about the mortgage crisis and the credit card debt Americans keep accruing - and then I remember that we learn from our parents - in this case, the United States government. Why shouldn't Americans continue to purchase luxury items like flat-screen TVs, purchase huge homes and cars they can't afford? The government continues to spend money on a war we can't afford, and our debt is the highest ever. We learn from the best.

TASHA SCHUMANN Castro Valley, CA

Tasha, honey, the government isn't your parent. Your parents aren't the government. Your parents are your parents and your government is your government.

But seriously, when you look at your government as some kind of nanny.... a tit to suckle off of. I guess no one should be surprised that liberals expect their government to do so many things for them.

So Tasha, sweetie, I'm going to call a Senator tonight to come over, tuck you in, and give you a little kiss on the forehead. Maybe even tell you a story. Like the one where he got wasted, drove a young girl off a bridge and killed her.

A college football contract

Apparently, Brian Kelly, coach of the University of Cincinnati football team, signed a long term deal with the school to extend his existing contract through the year 2012.

Right!

Don't get me wrong, I like Kelly and he's done a great job with the UC football program, but these contracts aren't worth the paper they're written on. Remember Rich Rodriguez? How about Bobby Petrino? Maybe Nick Saban? Mark Dantonio? All under contract.

College football has never been more exciting. But like most things in the free market, they will cannibalize their own success.

Along the football coaching front. I listened to Marvin Lewis' press conference yesterday. He has to lead the league in my self defined "arrogance ratio" (total arrogance divided by number of wins).

Let's face it.... football coaches by definition are arrogant (remember the show "Coach"). But for Marvin Shula to be as condescending to the media as he is, reaches an all new low.

Here's a clue phone for you Marvin Coslett, you're team sucks and you are it's leader. Reciting mantras like "making plays" and "doing your job" aren't cutting it and are not going to turn it around.

This city spent one half of a BILLION dollars on that playground for convicts down there. Your arrogance isn't needed to rub our noses in it; we get it after each and every loss on the field.

So Mr. Marvin LeBeau, remember.... you are a football coach (a losing one at that), not a neurosurgeon. Keep your arrogance to yourself.

And you wonder why players like Chad Johnson have bad attitudes.

Huck the Huckster

An interesting piece on Mike Huckbee from the American Thinker

Excerpt

When evangelicals embraced Jimmy Carter during the 1976 presidential campaign, they didn't know he would repudiate the Southern Baptist Convention a generation later. Today the very same constituency has glommed onto Mike Huckabee, and I can't help but lament how history truly does repeat itself.

One can see why the man I dubbed "Huck the Huckster" would appeal to evangelicals. He's a pro-life Southern Baptist minister with charm, wit and a good-ol'-boy, yuck-it-up style. Yet this resplendent exterior only serves to obscure the stain of liberal sin.

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Another example of gov't run healthcare

During lunch today, I needed to mail out some Christmas gifts and pick up some postage for Christmas cards.

So I ran to the local MailBox etc. to ship my package UPS. I waited for one person total of 5 minutes.

I get to the USPS and there is a line out the door! Needless to say, I'll mail cards tomorrow.

But Gordon, this is the holiday season, they're just really busy right now.

Really? the USPS didn't know that the Christmas season was their busiest time of year?

How is it that UPS managed to handle their busiest time of year without making their customers wait for an hour.

Welcome to your next prostate screening if a democrat wins the White House.

If you have to say it......

Once again, if you have to say, it's probably not true......

New Clinton campaign
out to show her likability

Article....

Thoughts on Christmas shopping

In the past, Christmas shopping for Gordon simply meant a picking up a bunch of gift cards at the local Kroger's.

Now that ole Gordon is married, I'm am reduced to actually "shopping" for Christmas gifts.

Some thoughts that occurred to Gordon while "shopping"

1) Christmas Shopping v. Waterboarding.... Which one is truly torture? I bet KSM would have stuck with the waterboard.

2) I don't understand why I should pay Old Navy or The Gap for clothing with their name on it. As far as I'm concerned, they should pay me for advertising their stores. At least, Joe's Painting gives me their ball caps and T-shirts for free.

3) If you are one of those fat asses who follow a person leaving the mall to their car so you can have their spot, fine. But could you at least get the hell out of my way so I can park out in the boonies.

4) After my post on Who would Jesus endorse? I think I need to ask WWJB (What Would Jesus Buy) Mrs. Gekko? After all, it is his birthday. So far, Jesus is telling me jewelry.....

5) Have you noticed that most of the people who cruise around in those scooters probably wouldn't need said scooter if they got a little exercise, like walking around the store.

6) After sniffing colognes, looking at clothing, picking up CD's etc. I'm thinking, you know, the best gift anyone could give is a free subscription to their favorite blog; it keeps on giving and giving...... much like an STD.

A muslim kitty cat

I thought this was a little humorous

Steyn against the Canadian Thought Police

Mark Steyn face charges against the Human Rights Tribunal

Excerpt

These days in Canada, if you're feeling down and blue, and you think somebody hates you, you bring your case to a Human Rights Tribunal. And the people you think hate you get that knock on the door, celebrated in the literature of the Soviet Gulag, and wherever else ideology triumphed over humanity in the 20th century's painful course. Your daddy, your mommy, your brubber, or more likely some newspaper pundit gets dragged before a committee of smug, leftwing, humourless, jargon-blathering adjudicators. After long delays that are costly only to the defendant and the taxpayer (and justice delayed is justice denied), you will have the satisfaction of making your enemy squirm, in a kangaroo court where he is stripped of the right to due process, in which there are no fixed rules of evidence, in which the ridiculously biased “judges” make up the law as they go along, and impose penalties restricted only by their grimly limited imaginations -- such as ruinous fines, and lifetime "cease and desist" orders, such that, if you ever open your mouth again on a given topic, you stand to go to prison.

Sounds a lot like the Ohio Civil Rights Commission.

Where's my global warming

It was 19 degrees this morning. The normal low is 26. Where the hell is my global warming? That global warming I drive my SUV to help create.

I should look on the bright side... Without the global warming, it would have been 17.2 degrees outside.

Bill Clinton intensifies his role

I wonder if he'll give up dating....

Article

Kennedy's split on endorsements

The Kennedy family has split on their endorsements.

To date, no Kennedy has endorsed the idea of taxi cabs.

Quit encouraging copycats

Excerpt

The way the media cover an event influences whether there will be repetitions. For example, if a fan runs onto the field during a baseball game, the broadcast cameras usually avoid showing pictures of the fan. The TV producers know that the fan on the field is seeking attention, and that, presumably, getting his picture on television will reward him. Moreover, broadcasting the man's antics would encourage copycats.

Killing time at a baseball game is a tiny misdeed, compared to killing people, but many media decisions have the effect of encouraging copycat murders.

More....

Ban gun ban areas

A great piece on allowing guns in public places.

Excerpt

Police have identified Robert A. Hawkins, 19, as the assailant who killed eight people with a semi-automatic rifle (not an assault rifle) at the Westroads Mall in Omaha Dec. 5.

Chalk up eight more deaths to "gun control."

The shooting was at least the fourth at an American mall or shopping center so far this year, including one in February in Salt Lake City.

Once again, the killer chose a "gun-free" zone.

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