Saturday, July 14, 2007

Approval Ratings

You know you're in deep when approval ratings come out and you're below Bush.

Bush - 33%
Congress - 24%
Horse Droppings - 22%

Lifestyle changes

Gordon went to the doc yesterday for some symptoms above and beyond the normal worms and fleas.

Apparently, there are some lifestyle changes in the works for Gordon.

Here are some of the changes

No's - Beer, Pizza, Ice Cream, Nachos, Cheeseburgers, Cheescake, Funnel Cakes

Yes's - Exercise & Broccoli

Apparently, no more table scraps for old Gordon either. It's enough to make the old bulldog go back to his cage and sleep.

Take it Easy on Me

Last night Gordon caught the Little River Band at the Miami Meadows Festival last night. I guess I was somewhat disappointed in the show even though they played all the big hits. It just seemed like the band lacked energy. Maybe, I've just been to too many head banger balls lately.

Some other notes.

If you let your 200 lb. teenage daughter go to a festival with a T-shirt on that says "I (heart) sex", it's probably a little too late to instill any discipline in the girl.

When the same said girl is texting and talking to her friends on her cell phone while you're yelling at her, she's probably not listening.

Have you ever noticed that the people who do the most texting and talking on cell phones have the least to say?

If you wear a blue tooth all the time, I'm sorry, but you're still an idiot.

Tonight is Starship at Miami Meadows. I will be there signing autographs... I think tonight I'll sign as Sting.

Friday, July 13, 2007

Pot Kettle Black Award

This week's PKB awards winner goes to.

Every dumb ass involved with the Live Earth fiasco; attendees, musicians, promoters, and Al Gore, the king of hypocrisy.

All of whom left a larger carbon footprint from their participation in the event than most SUV ridden families do in a year.

Really, what did Cameron Diaz & Leonardo DiCaprio, add to the event with their participation? Do you think that all their private plane trips were worth the price to educate all of us peons?

The only thing good about the whole thing is that so many of these self absorbed a-holes will think the problem is solved because they made us "aware" of the looming climate catastrophe.

It's been 80 plus degrees here lately, about normal for July, but the humidity has been great.

I'm firing up the SUV and get me some more of that.

Trivia Question

There are four universities that have produced a president and a Super Bowl MVP. Name the school, the MVP's and the presidents.

The Free Speech Party

Yeah the free speech liberals are at it once again.

Apparently, John Edwards, hair man for the little guy, and Hillary Clinton, the man in the family, had a conversation overheard where they wanted to eliminate the "lesser" candidates from future debates.

You know that Edwards guy; always talking for the little guy who he doesn't want to speak.

I'm goin' pro

This morning I read that Tadd Fujikawa, a 16 year old golfer. Tadd has made the decision to go pro following in the footsteps of Michelle Wie and Ty Tryon.

You don't remember Ty Tryon? Don't worry, neither does anyone else. Ty is now 23 and turned pro as a seventeen year old. He finally won a tour even, albeit on the Hooters Winter Tour.

Call me Nostradamus, but I'll predict as many PGA tour wins for lil' Tadd as Ty and Michelle.... a big fat zero.

Thursday, July 12, 2007

You can't make this stuff up

You're the director of a cadaver program at a local university; you're hurting for cash because you've been playing some point spreads with my cousins Tony, Vinny and Sal and you've had a streak of bad luck.

You have to come up with some fast cash, so you do what?

How about selling some cadavers? Great idea. Right? I mean who the hell's going to tell.

Well, wrong. But what makes getting caught so horrible is not that you got busted by the cops for something like gross abuse of a corpse; Instead you get busted by the IRS for not claiming the income on your tax returns.

I would call that a streak of bad luck.

Got a crappy product... Change the name

The Pittsburgh Public Schools have decided to drop the word "Public" from it's name because of "the district might be able to avoid the negative attitude often associated with public schools".

I know this sounds like a crazy idea but if you want to avoid the negative attitude associated with public schools how about not doing the things that generate the negative attitude about public schools.

Has it ever occurred to these geniuses, that acts like these are the very reasons people have a negative attitude about public schools. It's all about form over substance with these bureaucrats.

Really, has the school board ever considered doing a survey and actually improving the things that give "public" schools such a bad name. It's like putting perfume on a pig.

Wednesday, July 11, 2007

McCain again

I was just listening to the radio while running some errors. Apparently, John McCain and George RINOvich got into a tussle regarding RINOvich's remarks about the military being responsible for Al Queda.

Let's see, McCain was a boxer in the Navy and RINOvich....

Let's just say it shouldn't take long before the honorable Ohio senator starts crying.

McCain in Flames

Through out the campaign, one of the things that has gotten lost about John McCain is his overwhelmingly conservative voting record. The ACU rates him at 82.3 percent (compared to 75 % for George RINOvich) which is better than any of the other candidates running for president.

Unfortunately, on the few issues that he's not conservative on, he's more than willing to throw conservatives under the bus to get his face out on the issue.

So I don't think it's surprising that his campaign is falling apart. After all, what does McCain stand for? What sword would his campaign workers fall on for him? What is his vision for the country and how's he going to get people to enroll in the vision?

While I really haven't followed the campaign at all because, for me, it's way too damn early, the one thing these campaigns illustrate is your ability to manage your own campaign, to lead people when the going gets tough, and to keep people enrolled in the vision. If you can't manage those things within your own campaign, how are you going to manage a country for cryin' out loud.

When your vision is to simply be on TV all the time, you're going to fail long term.

I still offer that republicans in this race need to make a call, you either believe that government makes a difference in the world or it doesn't. If you believe that it does, then you're really a socialist. Why should conservatives vote for a socialist when we already have democrats?

So it ain't so

So let's say you are in Israel protesting the plight of the Palestinian people.

The Israeli army finds a tunnel where bombs have been smuggled in. The army decides to destroy the tunnel with a bull dozer.

You and your peace niks decide to protest at the site and a bull dozer accidentally runs over you and kills you.

Who do you sue?

Well, you could sue the Palestinians for building the tunnel in the first place; except that Palestinians have no money except for Yasir Arafat, who's already dead.

You could sue the Israeli Army, but chances are good they'd send the Mossad to take you out and you don't want that.

Well, if you're the family of Rachel Corrie, you sue Caterpillar, Inc., who manufactured the bull dozer in Peoria Illinois.

If you wonder why businesses take their production elsewhere, consider dealing with this caca.

Do the Wrong People Vote? Yeah

I while back I was having a conversation with a woman about voting. She became very apologetic when she said "I know I should vote but I just don't know what I'd be voting for."

Being Mr. Politics, I think she expected me to blast her for not voting. Instead, I said, "If you're not up to speed on what you're voting on, I'm glad you don't vote.

Well, the New Yorker has an article about voting and the the electorate that actually votes.

If the only people that actually voted were up to speed on the issues, maybe we'd end up with a congress that would actually fix Social Security instead of Global Baloney.

Tuesday, July 10, 2007

Vacation Ideas

So it's almost half way through the summer season and you still haven't decided what to do for vacation....

Think about taking a long weekend to visit the Accounting Hall of Fame in Columbus, Ohio.

Among all the picture of a lot of old white guys, you'll see fabulous displays of such things as

The first abacus.
The first slide rule ever produced.
The first adding machine.

Man, it gets me shivering just thinking about it.

Another SLUTH already

Meet Kent Couch. He's probably hard to see given that the guy is 11,000 feet above the earth's surface.

Couch does remind me of Larry Walters, the man he emulated with this stunt.

Here's the Wikipedia description of Walters 1982 act.

Walters and his girlfriend, Carol Van Deusen, purchased 45 four-foot weather balloons and helium tanks at California Toy Time Balloons. To avoid suspicion, they used a forged requisition from his employer, FilmFair Studios, saying the balloons were for a television commercial shoot. Walters then attached the balloons to his lawnchair, filled them with helium, donned a parachute, and strapped himself to the chair with a pellet gun (with which he intended to shoot the balloons to lower himself), a CB radio, sandwiches, soft drinks, and a camera. After that, things did not work out as he had planned. When his friends cut the cord that had tied his lawnchair to his jeep, Walters' lawnchair, which was planned to rise 100 feet above the ground, quickly rose to a height of about 16,000 feet (3 miles); he did not dare shoot any balloons, fearing that he might unbalance the load. He drifted over Long Beach and crossed the primary approach corridor of Long Beach airport.

After spending about 45 minutes in the sky, though, he came to the conclusion that he would have to shoot a few balloons after all; doing so caused him to descend slowly again, until the balloon's dangling cables got caught in a power line, causing a black out in a Long Beach neighborhood for 20 minutes, but also allowing Walters to climb down to the ground again.

If you are one of these types who believes in evolution, explain to me how, after a million years or so, we haven't be able to eliminate these guys from the gene pool.

Around the Blogger World

Candidates outside the box - One Oar in the Water
Scamming the Democrats - The Boring Made Dull
Senator's number found in Black Book - King's Right
Moore on CNN - Lincoln Logs

Good to have your priorities right.

Nice to see Rachel Hutzel, Warren County prosecutor, is out making the public safe from all those drunken canoe paddlers.

You see Hutzel is one of those politicians full of wisdom. She knows that drunken canoe paddling is a gateway crime and if you don't crack down, the next thing you know, you have Kayakers doing heroin or drunken flea market shoppers.

The SLUTH award

I forgot all about this award (SLap Upside The Head) a long time ago but I'm dusting it off today.

In many ways, kids have it so much easier than we did as kids but in many ways it's harder. For instance, my family was too poor to by me a car for my own personal usage so I saved $500.00 to buy my first baby blue 1972 Ford Pinto; top end speed of 58.5 mph (downhill).

So when I read in the paper about a kid getting killed driving a Camaro 100 mph, my first thought is "what in the hell were these parent's thinking?"

I was a teen age boy at one time. If I would have my hands on a Camaro, 100 mph would have been the standard. Fortunately for me and my friends, we had cars like a 63 Rambler, a 1970 AMC woody wagon, a 1970 Vega, a 1979, three on the tree, Ford Grenada. You never had to put a governor on these cars... they were self imposed.

So if you are a parent that lets your kid tool around in a car like this, I would like to slap you upside the head right now.

Trust me. It will be less painful and humiliating than a call from the Highway Patrol telling you your kid is dead.

Monday, July 09, 2007

Slow news day?

Front page story on my morning Cincinnati Enquirer: Pills for fat dogs.

That pug's too pudgy. Is your Husky too husky? Pooch got a paunch? Dogs get fat just like people, but a new drug helps

Now that I think about it..... Gordon looks like he could lose a few too.

Terrible Ted Strikes Again

Lo and Behold. Just as I finished up my post about the drug situation this morning, I just happened to be going through a Wall Street Journal I didn't get to read from last Tuesday.

Off all things to run into on the op-ed section, is a piece by non other than Ted Nugent about the 40th anniversary of the "Summer of Love", or as he calls it the "Summer of Drugs".

Here's Ted's Analysis of 1967

Forty years ago hordes of stoned, dirty, stinky hippies converged on San Francisco to "turn on, tune in, and drop out," which was the calling card of LSD proponent Timothy Leary. Turned off by the work ethic and productive American Dream values of their parents, hippies instead opted for a cowardly, irresponsible lifestyle of random sex, life-destroying drugs and mostly soulless rock music that flourished in San Francisco.

and the aftermath

A quick study of social statistics before and after the 1960s is quite telling. The rising rates of divorce, high school drop outs, drug use, abortion, sexual diseases and crime, not to mention the exponential expansion of government and taxes, is dramatic. The "if it feels good, do it" lifestyle born of the 1960s has proved to be destructive and deadly.

It's why Ted's the man.

Around the Blogger World

UC Financial Mess - BizzyBlog
The McCain Collapse - Third Wave Dave
Compute your Carbon Footprint - Earthlab
Live Earth Celebrities - Red State Rampage

What's up with the Drugs

For the past month or so, I've had numerous conversations with people regarding various drug addictions and the people who support said.

It blows me away the number of drug addictions people out there are managing; heroin, cocaine, meth, crack.

Then I hear a NASCAR driver was busted shooting heroin in the King's Island parking lot. I guess the Beast just wasn't enough of a thrill.

I know it's all anecdotal, but I would appreciate some feedback. Have you noticed a rise in addictive drug use? I'm just curious, maybe I'm hanging out with the wrong people.

Freddy's Back

Like the last five minutes of a horror movie; you know, just when you think Michael Myers is dead and somehow with a dagger through the heart and his eyes shot out, he raises up for yet another attack, here comes Cindy Sheehan.

You might remember Cindy as the woman who a couple of months ago decided she no longer wanted to be in the public spotlight. I guess running for congress against Nancy Pelosi isn't in the spotlight.

And just like Mike Myers, we couldn't kill her off with a six shooter full of silver bullets.

Sunday, July 08, 2007


I couldn't resist watching the Live Earth shows over the weekend.

My thoughts...

I saw The Police in concert in one their last shows before the break up. It will always go down as the worst show I ever saw. But they didn't fail me over the weekend, they were probably the 2nd worst show next to Madonna.

Madonna hun, I think your act needs to be moved to the Las Vegas strip. I wouldn't go watch that crap if I was comped with a free buffet.

It was nice to see all people coming in from Chicago, Philadelphia, LA for the show. I'm sure no one left a carbon footprint for those trips.

Finally, I've been thinking, after the Live Aid concerts apparently Ethiopian hunger ceased; after Farm Aid, every thing's hunky dory in Iowa, so hopefully now that all the music stars have contributed what they could maybe all the problem is solved as far as the media is concerned.

Oh and by the way, Kanye, you look stylish in all those sweatshop clothes you wore.