Friday, April 04, 2008

Maurice meet Chris... Chris, Maurice

It would be easy to pile on Chris Henry for his criminal escapades the past three years but I actually have a different take.

I really think this guy is mentally ill, or a drug addict. Let's face it, what professional football player goes clubbing with his own jersey on? You get negative street cred for that one.

We have an entire society that's totally enabled this clown to pull these stunts all because he was excellent in a football uniform. This guy needed an NFL contract like another shot of tequila. What he really needed was some real guidance from someone who cared.

Unfortunately, it sounded like his mother was about as dysfunctional as he was and who knows where dad was.

It's a sad tale really.

For the record, Chad Johnson is really no better and Bengal fans better get used to his act.

If you watched that bizarre interview on ESPN last night, you'll love this satire of Chad at the BK drive thru.

Excerpt
Ocho: I’m here.

Order Box: Can I take your order, Sir?

Ocho: I don’t know.

Order Box: You don’t know?

Ocho: Exactly. I DON’T KNOW.

Order Box: Okay.

(long pause)

Order Box: Would you like a hamburger or something?

Ocho: (sighs) I’ll take a Whopper and large fries. And an orange slice.

Order Box: Is Fanta okay?

(long pause)

Order Box: Sir?

Ocho: Who said Fanta? See now, this is exactly the kinda shit I’m talkin’ about.

Order Box: Sir?

Ocho: ORANGE SLICE.

Order Box: But we only have Fanta, Sir.

Ocho: Exactly. That's all you have. That's all you can do for Chad. And Chad has to decide if that's good enough for Chad.

2 comments:

Ben said...

I heard that when Wally Sczerbiak was at Miami he would wear his jersey out.

gordon gekko said...

That's kind of my point. It's so collegiate. Not big time.

It's probably why Henry was in Clifton on part of his crime spree.