Sports wrap up

Soccer

The world cup starts today. If you were to talk to Mrs. Gekko, she will tell you "I don't think there's a sport Gordon won't watch".

Well, soccer is one. During the year the US hosted the World Cup, I had a friend from Ethiopia who wouldn't shut up about soccer. After months of listening to him tell me I would like it if only I watched it with someone who knew the sport, I decided to watch the finals with him.

He talked me into coming over to his apartment where we proceeded to watch the most boring game in the history of sports; with Brazil winning a 0-0 snoozer and the game decided on penalty kicks.

I'm not one of those guys who has to watch all offense in my sports (heaven knows I wouldn't be a Bears fan if that were the case). But c'mon..... in that game, I think there was a 30 minute stretch with not one shot on goal. It would have been easier for me to score at a NOW convention.

Then an official had the audacity to call offsides. "Offsides"! Are you freakin' kidding me? You mean to tell me that one player attempted to cheat just to introduce offense to the game and you call him offside!

So you can call me one of those American elitist types who can't appreciate the nuance of soccer and I'll tell you that if guy who gets the nuance of baseball, curling and professional bowling can't get soccer, then it's impossible.

College football

It's nice for the Big Ten to admit Nebraska to their conference. It's a good fit. The Big Ten will continue it's tradition of having a bunch of big, fat, slow, farm boys on their football teams. Nebraska is also really good at loading up their record on a packs of non conference Twinkies; another good fit for a Big Ten school. No word yet on which of the MAC schools are willing to be sacrificed in Lincoln.

As an aside, we now have the Big Ten with 12 teams and the Big 12 with 10.

Now the Big Ten is after Texas and Texas A&M, but not Texas Tech, because apparently Texas Tech is not an AAU member. Pahhleeeeeez. Notre Dame is not an AAU member but the Big Ten would perform porn star acts on them to get them in the conference.

I find it so hilarious that the most socialist institutions in this country, American universities, are the biggest, greediest, money grabbing whores of any entity US institution(s).

They would sell anything and/or anybody for the ability to generate another buck and they couldn't care less about the poor little guy who could use the money more than they could. It's why the Big 12 fell apart. Basically, Texas got everything and the rest of the league got the table scraps leftover.

When this conference shakedown is done, if I were commissioner of the MAC, WAC or Mountain West conference, I would say that you can't play any of our member schools without a $5 million dollar pay out. Let's see how popular these power schools are when they can't pad their records on low lying fruit.

Baseball

For the first time in ten years, we have a baseball team in Cincinnati worth rooting for. Scott Rolen and Arthur Rhodes are carrying this team right now. Rhodes hasn't allowed a run since April 10th. Rhodes, now 40, is a tribute to all of us oldies, baldies and fatties.

And to think Jamie Moyer, 47, is still getting it done.

The Royals are in town this weekend, so the Reds should be getting phat big time.

Now I think I'm going to leave early so I can watch a repeat of the NCAA Lacrosse national championship. Somehow I can find the nuance in that sport.